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So something weird is going on. This vaxxed story against the non-vaxxed story. Like they’re playing in the park like a low-cost version of Medieval Times. Like it’s something you can bet on with your bookmaker. Is it real?
I mean, we’re Americans, with families, and within families there are clashes between sports, politics, and health. To even easier choices like “should we put mom in an assisted living facility or on an inflatable mattress in the garage”.
There may be someone in your family who smokes. Or worse, don’t smoke. Or, they might have voted for Bernie Sanders. Maybe they get coffee enemas because Gwyneth Paltrow said so. (A shout out to Steve Doocy.)
We all laugh at it, but we are respectful. Yet there is an us versus them narrative, pushed by the White House and the media. And they sound identical.
It’s like when someone shows up at a party dressed exactly like another guest and everyone asks “Hey, did you two call each other?” This is exactly what we should be asking Jen Psaki and Don Lemon.
This is Joe:
Biden 6/7: Millions of Americans are still not vaccinated // and because of this their communities are at risk // Biden: 9/9: Many of us are frustrated with the 80 million Americans still not vaccinated // Biden: 9/9: we have the tools to fight against covid-19, and a distinct minority of Americans … is preventing us from passing the course // Biden (9/9/21): that there what more to wait what more to see // Biden: (9/9/21) we have been patient but our patience is running out
This from a guy who got it all wrong. And here is the media:
Joy Reid, September 15: We start The Reidout with a message: OK, we got it! COVID is the precious one and you love it. You love COVID so much that you want it to spread in schools, in the office, at Walmart, on cruise ships, and in the club // Joy Reid, September 9: Most people I know who get vaccinated are irritated and really impatient at this point with those who for some reason refuse to do this easy thing to save us from this nightmarish pandemic. // Don Lemon, September 15: Most of the people I know who are vaccinated are irritated and really impatient at this point with those who for some reason refuse to do this easy thing to save us from this nightmare pandemic.
He’s stupid. What a broken-down conflict. These creeps are like the American gym teacher forcing us to play dodge ball with shirts and skins on when what we really want to do is play spin the bottle.
It makes you wonder about other conflicts you’ve seen on TV. For example, was there really a conflict between all black people and the police. or was it largely a narrative created for eyeballs and angst? Eyeballs and anxiety. I think I saw them open for Nine Inch Nails.
Or how about the rich versus the poor? What if the poor don’t hate the rich? They just want to be rich. And the rich would love to help. Because it’s not a zero-sum game.
But where are the notes in there? You don’t get the latest news every time a plane lands safely. But get two passengers banging shit on that plane, then come talk to me!
Or what about the genre? Do men and women really hate each other? Or, are gender differences what make men and women irresistible to each other. At least that’s the case with my female fans. These grannies can’t get enough.
But if you take out the media tampering, could it be that we all get along. Which is fatal. For the media. CNN wants you to think black people hate white people. And whites hate black people. Make that happen, and everyone will have new shoes!
But the moment a “hate crime” turns out to be false, it disappears as someone who hit on Al Capone’s wife. And so the vax vs. Unvax conflict is about as real as an argument over a Rolex about real housewives in Atlanta.
The vaxxed and the non-vaxxed are not the Hatfields and the McCoys. It is not forbidden for unvaxed girls to marry vaxxed boys. Romeo and Juliet never argued about ivermectin. Everything is just a fiction.
The whole story of the vaccine is about the people who decide when they want to be vaccinated. The media want it to be a war, however. Kind of like this:
((pause for the sketch of the husband and the whites fighting over the vaccination))
I’ve said it before: if Americans fight each other, the people in power escape our collective anger at their own corruption and incompetence. This is why businesses are trying to be woken up – hoping activists don’t do all the bad things they’re doing.
Of course, we are making underage labor work under appalling conditions, but we are going to use 2 trans-actors and a Mexican dwarf who is legally blind in the first ad campaign for these sneakers to get rid of those whiners.
Since Trump left the White House, CNN no longer has the conflict – and viewers no longer. There is no more Trump vs Never-Trumpers, and mysteriously, Black Lives Matter has just disappeared. But as their grades crumble like Hunter Biden on an exhausted prostitute, they realize they need a new war: the vaxxed and the unvaxxed.
Which distracts people from the real problems that Democrats and the media have made worse – crime, homelessness, the collapse of our social order. Food prices are rising faster than the potted seeds in Kat’s apartment.
Observing their own complicity, CNN and Biden sought division. Us against them, that would save them.
Oh at first they hated vaccines under Trump. Now, under Biden, they’re positively fascist about the jab. The Trump vaccine is bad, the Biden vaccine is good. Joy Reid, please pick up the white courtesy phone.
Joy Reid: And, look, I understand the hesitation. Look, I was hesitant when Donald Trump controlled the CDC and the FDA and manipulated them and made them publish lies. DYSON: Right. Law. REID: Any rational person was hesitant.
Unity is scary because it means the media is not needed. So they choreograph their cover exactly to Democrats’ taste: create dissent in the ranks, so those in power stay that way.
And their dissent should be directed against the non-vaxxed, an easy target until you take a close look at them and find out who they are:
- Blacks mistrust government medical decrees
- Women worried about getting pregnant or currently pregnant
- Fit young people willing to risk covid because they are so fit
- Immunocompromised and others medically unable to take the vaccine
- The undecided still make up their minds.
Do you see how different they are? You could even use media and the Dems favorite word “diversity”. But in this case, the diversity is detrimental to their argument, so you won’t hear it.
But we understand. Joe and CNN are both in free fall. In Joe’s case, literally. Joe needs something to get out of Afghanistan. And CNN needs something to save them from themselves. And that’s why they sound exactly the same. Biden should start every speech with “this is CNN” because now they’re both tainted.
They have more contempt for a pregnant woman weighing her vaccine options than the mostly peaceful protesters who killed cops and caused $ 2 billion in damage last summer. The fact that CNN even has 300 viewers is scarier than meeting Wolf Blitzer on a nude beach.
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And Joe needs you to blame your neighbor, so you don’t blame him. It’s not their incompetence, it’s their stupidity. Some unifying people. Yoko Ono did better by bringing the Beatles together.
Demonizing the non-vaxxed is how Joe immunizes himself against guilt. But sorry Joe, you are a revolutionary case. Inoculation failed. And you too. The Americas are going to stick together, whether you like it or not.
This article is adapted from Greg Gutfeld’s opening monologue in the September 17, 2021 edition of “Gutfeld!”